Showing posts from February, 2013

POTSC: unedited version

*This blog is the result of being asked to share my story on People of the Second Chance. What follows is the unedited version. Some of the content has been taken from previous blogs.

--> This is my confession.

Cheater. Liar. Manipulator. Unrepentant. Divorced. Deceiver. Hypocrite. Disqualified.

These labels describe my life at some level. They are an ugly but real part of my story.

Once a recognized church planter, lead pastor, and conference speaker with 2 Master’s degrees and a PhD, I allowed sin to destroy my life. I still remember the feelings of guilt and shame I experienced the first time I was unfaithful to my wife. And yet somehow I convinced myself that I was the exception to the rule. In my mind, my sin would not be exposed. I would survive. Yes I attempted to stop with my own tainted willpower. I hid my sin. I lied. I covered. I did what was necessary to protect my self and my reputation. But eventually my unrepentant sin caught up to me and my world came crashing i…

Unexpected Blessings

I travel almost every weekend of my life. My normal schedule is to leave Thursday afternoon and return on Sunday night.  While this schedule allows me to focus on my children on the 3 1/2 days I have them, it does cause me to miss out on some aspects of their lives as well. One of the most difficult consequences of my choices is not being able to kiss my kids good night every night and the small moments I miss when they are with their mom. It is one of the small things I took for granted during my pre-divorce days.

This past weekend I was scheduled to be in the Midwest but our event was cancelled at the last minute due to the crippling wintery weather in that region so I received an unexpected weekend off. Here are a few of the unexpected blessings I got this weekend that I tended to take for granted in the past.

- I got to hang out with Zac and Ragan on Friday night and watch a movie.
- I got to take care of one of my children when she was sick.
- I got to go on a one-on-one date wit…

Identity Theft

Violated. Vulnerable. Exposed. Afraid.

Last weekend, my computer bag and all its contents were stolen at LAX airport.  The hope that a Good Samaritan had simply picked up my bag and turned it in quickly vanished when I realized someone was invading my privacy and trying to hack into my accounts.  My glimmer of hope was replaced quickly with feelings of vulnerability and desperation - especially considering the fact we have limited access to banks on the weekend.

The next several hours and days of my life brought out a full range of emotions in me but the one overall feeling that I could not shake was the reality of being exposed and vulnerable to the destructive efforts of someone I do not know trying to steal what is mine.

I have to admit that those feelings have not completely dissipated and I still feel a level of vulnerability and exposure.

Having someone steal your identity is a horrible experience and feeling. Rest assured that I will never make the simple mistakes again that I…