A Husband and a Dad

My blog has been quiet in recent months. To be honest, I haven't really wanted to write anything which is strange for me.  By nature, I love to write.  I am a fairly gifted writer but recently I have had little desire to write.  I was even asked to write some articles for a widely read website but simply did not have the craving to put together anything.  I even sat down to write a few times but what I wrote just didn't seem that important so I left it unpublished.

What does seem important to me right now is being a good husband and father. For most of my life, I have focused on a number of things that most people consider important: getting a good education, growing churches, networking, teaching, mentoring, leading, and a number of other "important" matters that occupied most of my time.

Don't get me wrong - all of those matters are wholesome and valuable in their own way. And they have their proper place in life.  But they are not the matters that seem most important to me now.

What matters to me most are the precious gifts that God has given me in my wife and children.  I took those gifts for granted in the past and it cost me.  I don't plan to make that mistake again.

For the last several months, I have been intentional to create memories with my children - to love them deeper. We have spent a lot of focused time together. We have taken trips. We have done things we probably would not have done a few years ago. We have laughed. We have acted crazy. We have taken multiple vacations. Put simply, we have enjoyed life. And I feel closer to my kids today than I ever have. That reality alone is a testimony of God's redemptive grace.

A counselor once told me when my first marriage was struggling that I would learn to love and be loved at some point in my life.  He hoped it was during my first marriage and not after I had lost everything.  His prophetic words became my truth.

I did not learn to love and be loved during my first marriage.  But God has given me a second opportunity. And this time, I am focused. I am centered on loving Ashley as Jesus loves me. I am focused on allowing her to love me as Jesus loves me.  And I am learning that marriage truly is a gift to be cherished.

I have worn a lot of titles in my life but only two really matter to me right now: husband and daddy. And I have a feeling that when most of my life has passed that those are the two titles that will continue to matter.

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