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Showing posts from March, 2012

Dealing with the Fallen

I was asked recently what suggestions I would give to people who are trying to reach out to someone in their life who has made or is making a bad decision or who has fallen into some type of sin. How should we approach the person? What is or is not effective and appropriate in those moments? How can we love a person while disagreeing with them?

I can't tell you how to deal with these situations in every circumstance but I can share what I have learned through my experience.  Here are some things I would encourage you to consider when dealing with someone you love who is choosing self over what appears to be God's best:

Guilt is rarely an effective motivator.  Guilt rarely generates true change. And even if you are able to "guilt" a person into making the right decision, rarely will that decision change or sustain their heart.

You do not know the whole story - don't assume you do.  There is always more to the story than what you know. Embrace that reality when you a…

I forgive you, BUT...

It is amazing how one small conjunction can change everything. The word "but" is a small word, BUT it is a word that can support or contradict everything that precedes it. For that reason alone, the word but is small in size but huge in meaning.

Consider these examples:

I forgive you, but...
I love you, but...
I support you, but...
I believe in you, but...
I want to be your friend, but...

"But" changes everything.  What each of these phrases screams is conditional forgiveness, love, support, belief, and friendship.

Does but always imply conditions? Not necessarily but usually - even if the conditions seem warranted. For instance, a parent might say to their rebellious child: "I love you but we will not tolerate drugs in this house."  But does not necessarily negate the original expression of love. Yet this type of "but" statement tends to be the exception to the rule.

Only God can exhibit and enable true unconditional love, grace and forgiven…

God is on Our Side

I have not blogged in recent weeks. To be honest with you, I still have a lot of ups and downs in my journey and sometimes I simply do not feel like writing. Usually it is because I am struggling with something God is teaching me.  I have been processing a lot in recent weeks and asking God to clarify my next steps. I am not sure I have an answer but I was reminded this past week that God is in absolute control and I can trust Him.

The tone and content of most of my blogs reflects my life experience. I teach and write in a way that reflects what God is doing in my heart. Oftentimes that means that what I write or say is raw and authentic. I believe that's how most people want it - raw and real.  Anything else just seems too contrived and ideal.

I want to encourage some of you today who are struggling with God's direction for your life. For the first time in my life, I am really unsure of God's next step for me. There are a lot of people in my life who have personal opinion…